Child Eater

One Sentence Review:

In spite of some pretty questionable acting, this film's creepy, tension-filled storyline had me completely hooked and ready to go two thumbs up but sadly, a last second dog-baby (some filmmakers don't know when to stop) instantly spoiled my mood.

Would I Watch It?

 

YES

Would I Buy It?

 

NO

 

 

 

RINGS

One Sentence Review:

147 minutes without one decent scare or interesting event, that's quite an accomplishment.

Would I Watch It?

 

NO

Would I Buy It?

 

NO

 

 

 

Ghosts Of Darkness

One Sentence Review:

I don't think I have ever seen such a drastic range of performance quality in a movie (from amazing to wooden & horribly mis-cast) than that of 'Ghost Of Darkness' but ultimately, the strength of Paul Flannery's on screen presence is enough to overcome the film's many flaws and make it a semi-enjoyable viewing.

Would I Watch It?

 

YES

Would I Buy It?

 

NO

 

 

 

Sisters Of The Plague

One Sentence Review:

A nicely produced indie, Arthouse film with a great atmospheric New Orleanian backdrop but its snail's pace and esoteric storyline will not likely appeal to most Horror fans.

Would I Watch It?

 

YES

Would I Buy It?

 

NO

 

 

 

Bornless Ones

One Sentence Review:

Definitely, not perfect (the script could've used some serious dialogue & character revisions) but as a whole, this Evil Dead tribute is as crazy & fun as it is gory & distrubing.

Would I Watch It?

 

YES

Would I Buy It?

 

YES

 

 

 

The Girl With All The Gifts

One Sentence Review:

Insanely well made (Glen Close is in it for fuck sake) and shines an alternative & fascinating light upon the tired, old Zombie/Infected genre but ultimately, its dramatic storyline lacks the edge that I prefer in my Horror movies.

Would I Watch It?

 

YES

Would I Buy It?

 

NO

 

 

 

Get The Girl

One Sentence Review:

Some decent twists & turns amidst this compelling storyline but for a Black-Comedy, it's lacking in laughs and the final reveal is unrealistically convoluted & too saccharine for my taste.

Would I Watch It?

 

YES

Would I Buy It?

 

NO

 

 

 

Deadly Virtues: Love.Honour.Obey. Story

One Sentence Review:

'Deadly Virtues' takes an unwelcomed turn from nasty home invasion to near chick-flick levels of sappiness in the third act but overall, it's still interesting enough for a watch.

Would I Watch It?

 

YES

Would I Buy It?

 

NO

 

 

 

Dead Story

One Sentence Review:

Bad acting & ghosts with reptile eyes(?) ... all you need to know!

Would I Watch It?

 

NO

Would I Buy It?

 

NO

 

 

 

The Snare

One Sentence Review:

A really cool concept supported by great cinematography & an ominous soundtrack but its slow pace and cryptic finale is frustrating and won't appeal to most viewers.
Would I Watch It?

 

YES

Would I Buy It?

 

NO

 

 

 

Honky Holocaust

One Sentence Review:

A socially conscious, race war film that delivers this important message ... if your script is based in San Francisco, don't shoot it in Boston with actors(?) that have strong New England accents ... some people may not want to confront this issue but it's imperative, for the sake of our global community, that they do.
Would I Watch It?

 

NO

Would I Buy It?

 

NO

 

 

 

 

Clinical

One Sentence Review:

A killer beginning with an explosive, bloody conclusion but of the movie's bloated 104 minutes, it spends way too much time boring the audience with unnecessary psychoanalytical mumbo jumbo.
Would I Watch It?

 

YES

Would I Buy It?

 

NO

 

 

 

Arbor Demon

One Sentence Review:

In spite of the bad title (changed from 'Enclosure' which is only marginally better), this film is pretty solid with very innovative monster designs and a must see performance from Jake Busey ... I know but he's really great in this one.

Would I Watch It?

 

YES

Would I Buy It?

 

YES

 

 

 

Pitchfork

One Sentence Review:

No Slasher, no matter how great overall, can recover from a choreographed dance party scene but this one doesn't even try.

Would I Watch It?

 

NO

Would I Buy It?

 

NO

 

 

 

B.C. Butcher

One Sentence Review:

The comically bad costumes & props didn't blend well with the bland, completely laughless script.

Would I Watch It?

 

NO

Would I Buy It?

 

NO

 

 

 

Ouija: Origin Of Evil

One Sentence Review:

If you can get past the CGI FX & hacky ending, Mike Flanagan's sequel, to the big budget shit-sandwich, 'Ouija', is pretty good and definitely brings some memorable moments that will make your skin crawl.

Would I Watch It?

 

YES

Would I Buy It?

 

YES

 

 

 

First Born

One Sentence Review:

Well made indie-horror from the UK that is cleverly written and provides some good scares & creature FX.

Would I Watch It?

 

YES

Would I Buy It?

 

YES

 

 

 

The Amityville Exorcism

One Sentence Review:

Bad script, bad acting and bad FX but worst of all, unoriginal & fucking boring.

Would I Watch It?

 

NO

Would I Buy It?

 

NO

 

 

 

Beyond The Gates

One Sentence Review:

Worth a watch for its retro 80's, VHS/video store motif but the lack of anything else substantial, story wise, makes it feel completely one dimensional.

Would I Watch It?

 

YES

Would I Buy It?

 

NO

 

 

 

The Orphan Killer

One Sentence Review:

Despite the extremely derivative storyline (pick any classic Slasher ... it's in there) and stupid production choices (like dressing a catholic school teacher up like a fucking hooker), this film is able to skate by (just barely) on the caliber of it's amazing practical FX and innovative kill scenes.

Would I Watch It?

 

YES

Would I Buy It?

 

YES

 

 

 

The Eyes Of My Mother

One Sentence Review:

An ice-cold slice of home-spun insanity unflinchingly displayed in gorgeous, B&W arthouse packaging.

Would I Watch It?

 

YES

Would I Buy It?

 

YES

 

 

 

Krampus: Unleashed

One Sentence Review:

Of all the shitty Krampus movies out there, it could be a lot shittier but that really isn't saying much, is it?

Would I Watch It?

 

NO

Would I Buy It?

 

NO

 

 

 

Krampus: The Devil Returns

One Sentence Review:

Crap-pus #2: The Devil Re-Turds.

Would I Watch It?

 

NO

Would I Buy It?

 

NO

 

 

One Sentence Review:

Gory & brutal with an amazing soundtrack that drives the tension to near critical levels ... an instant Xmas Horror classic.

Would I Watch It?

 

YES

Would I Buy It?

 

YES

 

 

One Sentence TBT Review:

The storyline is riddled with plot holes and the production was obviously done on the cheap but somehow that all just adds to the charm of this creepy & unpredictable Xmas Slasher.

Would I Watch It?

 

YES

Would I Buy It?

 

YES

 

 

One Sentence Review:

A cool storyline overall but the unnecessarily complex twists & turns of the third act are hard to follow and become redundant & annoying.

Would I Watch It?

 

YES

Would I Buy It?

 

NO

 

 

One Sentence Review:

A Latin American style, Lost Boys ripoff that misses the mark with its heavy-handed, cool-guy dialogue and convoluted storyline.

Would I Watch It?

 

NO

Would I Buy It?

 

NO

 

 

One Sentence Review:

A tight, intelligent, indie time travel, mind-warper that will keep you guessing until the very end.

Would I Watch It?

 

YES

Would I Buy It?

 

YES